the honest truth

you're right. lauren's article link is what cemented the decision for me. and I couldn't have said it better myself about those people who seem to have unlimited time!

very well said... I'll be looking forward to your return as I've only just recently found you. I hope this comes across the way I mean it to, but your IG and blog are ones I look forward to, without a stitch of envy (except perhaps for your stripe collection?? hehe)..I think because I find myself relating to you. Yes, your photos are beautiful, and you manage to get your project life completed almost always weekly (you lucky duck) but there is a simple honesty in your words and photography that makes you incredibly relatable. Good luck on this journey Rachel...you and your beautiful family are worth the effort. xo.

I have written three different things I want to say about this, but I can't adequately explain in writing. In short, though, I relate.
Lately, I have retreated somewhat into a philosophy of being the last to know- the last to know what fitter girls than me did today in the gym, what better cooks cooked, what my business competitors built today, and what my colleagues earned.
It is part of the mental quiet I need to live in nowadays to get into "flow"- which for me means total and complete presence in whatever I am doing. Peace.
Part of that has been staying away from my favorite blogs, etc. I had to leave when I went from comparing myself and feeling bad to just not caring. No outfit was cute anymore, no food looked good. I was desensitized to the images, and I finally realized that's because the internet has turned into one big groupthink. So few people are doing things differently because they are so busy imitating the successful few, not realizing uniqueness is the draw, not constant postings.
Look closely: It's all the same photography effects on variations of the same recipes; the same formulaic little outfits just with different colored items; the same, the same, the same. The volume of copycat stuff available on the internet totally dilutes the power of the original to the point that, for me, the usefulness and novelty is totally gone. Not fun anymore.

There is a difference to me between glorifying the everyday because it is beautiful and just embellishing it. One appreciates the simplicity of life and the other is a lie. I had to get away from that. It doesn't make me feel good; it doesn't teach me anything,

I think stepping away and focusing on *your* originality, which is totally evident by the things you make, etc., is a good thing for you and those with whom you choose to share.

-V

I found your blog via your project life pages which i love and adore this honestly. Its so timely for me as I just deleted my instagram account for the exact same reason. IG was not adding anything positive to my life in any way, all I was doing was comparing myself to others and adding to my growing list of things to buy so I could be more like these people! I have two beautiful little boys and many times I would be on IG instead of being in the moment with them, I needed to get back in the real world and appreciate and love what I have xxx

i absolutely adore this blog of yours. honest, real, beautiful
xx

I love and adore everyone's words here. You are all beautiful.

I want to point out a nasty truth, though. That there's less reason to blame yourself for feelings of comparison, competition, even dissatisfaction and envy, than you might have taken on. I make a study of narcissism in our culture. And the sad truth is, narcissism and energy vampirism of viewers and followers is rampant all over food/decor/fashion/"crafts" blogs and feeds. Even people who might seem simple and humble are often calculatedly siphoning love and attention, albeit unconsciously, to toxic levels.

I suppose what I'm saying here echoes other posters. Follow your gut. Feel drained after looking at someone's Instagram feed or blog? That might not be your fault. Protect yourself, especially at such an already potentially-draining time of year.

One thing about Big City Quiet among other sites is that, while sometimes I feel stunned by the quality I see, I feel more inspired and challenged than envious or bad. I think that's how you tell.