"A portrait of my child, once a week, every week in 2014"
i try so, so hard not to be one of those mothers who compare timelines to other children. DJ learned to crawl and walk quite quickly, had two teeth at 5 months (and ten now, at 13 months) and says mama, dada and kitty. but. but but but. i was wondering when the pointing was going to come in. waiting waiting wondering wondering. and this week, i caught his first point on camera. this. this is why i love having my camera handy.
it's been too long since i've shared pages from my one little word 6x8 mini album. truth is, it has been on the side burner for a while until this past week where i finally finished up some of the incomplete pages that were sitting around. i'm falling in love with the album again, and that's a good thing.
spread 18.
i've always strived to be open, honest and real here in this space, and while that does often leave me feeling raw and vulnerable, i have found an awful lot of comfort in putting my thoughts out into the world and the response that i often receive when i do so. as such, i want to continue to only speak the truth, and not sugar coat my life in any way.
the truth is: as far back as i can remember, i have found it hard to maintain a solid level of happiness. i constantly ebb and flow. in fact, depression runs in my family - more specifically the women - and i have had a couple bouts in the past fifteen years.
when i am feeling unhappy, the first thing i often do is go out and buy some clothes, or new scrapbooking supplies, or something new for the house, thinking that i would feel better if only: i had nicer clothes, or a gorgeously decorated house. if only. if only. if only.
what i have come to realize lately is that everything i need to be a happier person is already inside of me. material possessions are not going to make a lick of a difference. in fact, once the shine factor wears off, i am left feeling guilty and stupid over spending the money in the first place.
everything that i need to be a happier person is already inside of me. i just have to find a way to bring it out. how do i do that? well, i think it begins with changing my attitude.
"I’m always happy with what I’m doing, because I don’t compare it to anything else, and instead pay close attention to the activity itself. I’m always happy with whoever I’m with, because I learn to see the perfection in every person. I’m always happy with where I am, because there’s no place on Earth that’s not a miracle.
life will suck if you are always wishing you are doing something else. life will rock if you realize you're already doing the best thing ever. "
- zen habits
i am making a conscious effort to be more present in my daily activities, to see the beauty in cleaning the kitchen and emptying the dishwasher.
i'm finding a way to prioritize the things that truly bring me joy, like spending time outside with my son, reading and writing.
i will begin writing a gratitude list each night before bed.
and instead of focusing on all the things that i want to change about myself, i'm going to begin focusing on the things about myself that i am happy with, because this unhappiness that i often feel begins and ends with me and my (often negative) attitudes towards myself and my life.
i'm ready to regain control of my life.
everything that i need to be a happier person is already inside of me.
xo,
rdg
"A portrait of my child, once a week, every week in 2014"
there are moments that i will always, always remember. watching dj take part in his first easter egg hunt will certainly be one of them.
each time i complete a project life spread i think: i need to include more personal notes: what we've been doing, what we're looking forward to, what we've been cooking or want to cook. movies we have seen or want to see. wouldn't i be as interested in those details as i am in seeing photos of DJ playing outside, or how i rearranged the living room?
in an effort to push myself into including more of these personal details in my spreads, i'm starting here.
here's what's been going on around here.
around here i've feeling revived after some alone time at home while dj was with his grand parents. i stayed in my pajamas longer, drank fewer cups of coffee, worked on blog posts and look photographs. and, i slept. oh did i sleep.
spread 16
"A portrait of my child, once a week, every week in 2014"
saturday morning dj woke up with the best bed head i've seen on him yet. he thought it was quite funny, too.
back in february i entered - and won! - a giveaway for triangle decals from the very lovely anne hill. for over a month, they sat on my desk, just waiting for me to find the time to put them up. thanks to a hubby who drove dj over to his parents yesterday morning while he worked, this mama had seven blissful hours to do what she wished.
spread 15
i'm so happy and excited to announce that i am on the DDE creative team. can't wait to get to work on some beautiful new project life pages!
"A portrait of my child, once a week, every week in 2014"
after some serious tears, dj is always the biggest trooper when it comes time for his shots. honestly, i think it's harder on me. bandages on his chubby thighs always make me smile, though.
even though the past few days here in vegas have brought about a drop in temperatures and fierce winds, it is still spring, and just the thought of t-shirts and sunglasses, jean shorts and flip flops is enough to get me through. summer (especially here in vegas) is just around the corner.
though our winters are mild, there is always a shift when spring comes along. suddenly we spend more time outside, open the windows, clean out the cobwebs both in our homes and our lives, and spend more time with friends and family.
my to-do list is stacking up. most of the items on it are a work in progress, something that i won't have the satisfaction of striking off for some time, but i take comfort in knowing that i'm working towards something. i never have been one to like standing still, waiting on the peripheral of what's next. but this morning... this morning i'm thinking about the here and now.
things that catch my eye.
morning light
green eyes
textures
long, wavy hair
reflections
things i want to purchase, but shouldn't.
white converse shoes
thick gold rings
a rose gold watch
anchorman 2 on dvd
a studio calico handbook
indoor plants
what i want to get better at this year.
spending less
making my bed
washing my face at the end of the day
eating healthier and smarter
patience
not wasting my time
a few songs i could listen to over and over again.
all of me by john legend
undermine from nashville
someone like you by adele
small bump by ed sheeran
radioactive by imagine dragons
talk dirty by jason derulo
i won't give up by jason mraz
neon by john mayer
royals by lorde
the only exception by par amore
angel by jack johnson
food i never tire of.
sushi
pizza
cheese and crackers
oreos
tea
things in my bag.
planner
journal
wallet
two pens
bobby pins and hair elastics
my phone
an empty gum wrapper
chapstick
blush
tide to go pen
places i want to visit.
new zealand
chicago
new york with my hubby
portland, oregon
smells i like.
cinnamon
library books
apple cider
coffee
my husbands t-shirts
the nape of my son's neck
bacon
salmon
campfire
words i love.
epiphany
epitome
hush
honesty
raw
cobbled
xo,
rdg
xo,
rdg
